1. We don’t understand ourselves
All of us are crazy in very particular ways. The problem is that knowledge of our own neuroses is not at all easy to come by.
2. We don’t understand other people
Our brains are primed to take tiny visual hints and construct entire figures from them – and we do the same when it comes to the character of our prospective spouse.
3. We aren’t used to being happy
We marry the wrong people because the right ones feel wrong. We don’t ultimately associate being loved with feeling satisfied.
4. Being single is so awful
After a certain age, society makes singlehood dangerously unpleasant.
5. Instinct has too much prestige
Back in the olden days, marriage was a rational business. What replaced the marriage of reason was the marriage of instinct, the Romantic marriage. If one felt ‘in love’, that was enough.
6. We don’t go to Schools of Love
Presently, we marry without any information. We go into it without any insightful reasons as to why marriages fail.
7. We want to freeze happiness
We want to marry the person we are having a terrific time with.
8. We believe we are special
Marriages face immense challenges. And we do not easily apply this insight to our own case.
9. We want to stop thinking about Love
We are exhausted by the melodramas and thrills that go nowhere.