Don'tDateHimGirl.com, Tasha Cunningham - CEO Interview

OPW INTERVIEW -- May 3 -- "This is 1 of the worst people to be involved with. He will lie cheat and deceive. He live off women and has no real education. Will claim someone else's baby but cannot take care of his own then brings another into the world." So goes the testimonial to Mr L.Simon on DontDateHimGirl.com. Here's what the CEO of DDHG has to say... - Mark Brooks

Tell me about DontDateHimGirl.com. What inspired you to create the site?
It began with a conversation that I had with some of my girlfriends in late 2005. We were talking about dating and sharing different bad date horror stories with each other. I thought that there had to be a way that women could get together to have that conversation on a larger scale, a global discussion of women sharing their dating stories.

Your site allows women to warn other women about bad dates. How do you know that the women who post aren't the crazy ones? Maybe she got vindictive because he just wasn't that into her. What if he is actually innocent of accusations? Do you feel any responsibility to protect the innocent?
That’s not for the owner of the website to decide. We provide the forum and free information and discussion occurs among the users, not among the website’s owners or administrators. In addition, it would be specifically impossible for any site to verify every third party posting. We get hundreds of postings a day. That’s why we allow men to fully participate in the discussion and freely post their side or say whatever they want to say uncensored.

There was a Dr. Phil show featuring you and a man who claimed that the negative comments posted about him on DDHG were false. He filed a lawsuit. What ever became of that?
It was dismissed. We are protected by a Federal law called the Communication Decency Act, as is every social networking site out there. We are exempt from liability for third party comments posted on our websites. It’s pretty obvious that I did not make those comments about that guy, I don’t even know who he is.

In legal cases where websites such as Craigslist did not encourage offensive content and in fact took steps to discourage it, doesn't your site, by the nature of it, encourage words that could be libelous?
No, absolutely not. When you sign up for DontDateHimGirl.com and become a member, you have to read and agree to our terms of use, an iron clad policy that encourages people to post the truth. In fact, we explicitly state in our terms of use that users are not to post anything that could be considered defamatory, slanderous, and libelous. It is also explicitly stated throughout our site that we warn users not to post any identifying information such as social security numbers, phone numbers, email addresses, place of work or workplace addresses. Profanity is automatically filtered out and we have IP tracking, so if our site is being used for any purpose other then what its supposed to be used for, we’re able to track the user through their IP address. We put these measures in place specifically so that these kinds of things don’t happen. 

What would you personally do if someone posted negative and false information about you and the site owner refused to remove it?
There are outrageous things that are posted about me online. The Internet is basically like the Wild, Wild West of information. People think that they can just post whatever they want anonymously. So, I could spend my time running around trying to prove that all of the false statements about me on the Internet are untrue, or I could focus on things that mean something to me, like our DDHG Empower Fund, which allows us to donate part of our earnings to help with different women’s charities. We’re doing something with the Women’s Fund of Miami and the National Women’s Fund to help with domestic violence. 

Have you considered a section for people who want to rave about great dates?
Women are doing it now, whether it’s a friend or a brother, with the intent to fix him up. We’re starting to see that a lot of women put themselves there to be searchable as a way to connect with other women as friends.

DDHG is bursting with great topical content. What are the site's most popular features?
Profiles are strong, but our news section is very popular, because that’s part of the mission of the site. It’s not just to let these women share their negative experiences, but once they’re on the site they can learn how to make better decisions in their dating life. In the Don’t Date Him Girl community, they’ll find experts who can sympathize with their situation and advise them accordingly. It’s also a great place for men to learn how to improve their relationships with women. 

Tell me about your new Facebook application, Love Inspector.
We created the application to introduce ourselves to the Facebook audience, which we hadn’t really done before. The application is, what I like to call, a woman’s best friend, because it’s a daily dose of dating and love and relationships. Add it to your Facebook profile and receive the newest DDHG articles and advice (which link back to the site) every day. 

What does the future hold for DDHG?
We’re adding new contributors and growing our advice community. If you want to know what’s happening in the world of dating or get advice on a particular relationship problem - users can directly email our contributors with questions. Women write to us about how the site has helped them or how DDHG has touched their lives, so we’re thinking of adding a devoted testimonial section because we get so many.

What message would you most like to get out there?
I think, historically, because of the fact that men and women speak different languages in relationships; many women are lost as to how to effectively understand men. Women really need to assess their relationship goals before they even step into the dating world, and then take proactive steps to get there. The slogan of the site is Don’t Date Him, Girl, until you check him out first.

Comments

[Connnector - jivelo.com]

I agree with Tasha, dating has a self-education component. Having various relationships doesn’t make you promiscuous, it makes you someone who doesn’t want to spend his or her life with the wrong person and who has hopes of finding the right one.

For example www.jivelo.com helps its users become better at dating through the use of stories. The stories are insightful and dating / relationships stories can be powerful tools if used as learning incidents.

[Sarah L]

I saw your site first on I believe it was Dr. Phil? I thought you had the right idea, though, about keeping women informed NAD, what I think is most important, being backed up by a sense of community. Now I think a lot of women can get downright nasty, and can certainly post some things that are definitely...one sided, to say the least. So if people remain adult about these things and take a particularly bad posting with a grain of salt, I think it can be a great tool.

[William]

Sarah, I agree with you, some women can get downright nasty, they just go a little overboard at times, but then again so can men. I think problems arise in relationships once the person starts to rely on the other far too much, but that is just my opinion.

[Mary]

DDHG, Dontdatehimgirl.com is one of the most disturbing and contraversial sites on the web. It is the website owners responsibility to manage a site with integrity and not hide behind laws that will soon be changed, hopefully. This site is harmful to men and women alike. It's a trap, so don't be fooled. The easily seen site language leads you to believe you can edit/delete posts - WRONG. The pages only lead you to the forums where all the juicy stuff is that get emotions racing. Post on the easy pages to find and it's posted forever. There are no instructions on not to post on the forums. Oh, and if the website feels like they want to delete a post at their discretion, they will, and they will make sure that there is a hidden html (created by the website masters) that Google searches will still find, even if there is no content and posts have been deleted. How indispicable can that be??

There are NO instructions on the use of the backend of the site where they claim you can edit/delete. And NO technical support whatsoever.

It's a disgrace that Tasha doesn't clean her act up and finds every chance she can for publicity on abuse cases and people that are in troubled relationships.

WARNING: The fine print is about a font size 1 or on pages you have to go search for behind the scenes, so before you register or post, you better do your homework.

Rating: F++++++

[Keesha Kennter]

What a tragedy…It needs to end. Can we start a program like Mother’s Against Drunk Driving? How about we call it MADDHG? Many Against Don’t Date Him Garbage.
The Love Doctor of DDHG is a FAKE…pure and simple. (Kelly Gray? Or is it Kelly Coverup? or From Kelly?) and the website owner Tasha Cuntingham are pacing a fast trail of possible deception, liable, and slander. My name is Keesha and I posted as DDHGHateGroup on a blog as a person sharing my own opinion.

http://blogs.miaminewtimes.com/riptide/2009/02/dontdatehimgirlcom_has_somethi.php

The Love Doctor of DDHG (Kelly Gray? Or is it Kelly Coverup?) and the website owner Tasha Cuntingham are pacing a fast trail of possible deception, liable, and slander. My name is Keesha and I posted as DDHGHateGroup and in all fairness to the readers of this site and others and mostly to an unfair recipient of the hate from DDHG, I chose to give my real name in this blog. The MNT blog shows evidence on how despicable the site of DDHG and its “whatevers” have become. They assumed it was someone else and posted another person’s email on the web and then acted like it wasn’t the staff of DDHG. If that isn’t HATE GROUP related, what is? Go read it… If Kerry Gray responded that an imposter was posting in her name (blah blah blah), why would she go against all of her previous posts of being such a positive “Love Doctor”? and then comment that she knows the email is all over the web? It’s not. Now the only place it shows up is on the blog and it is due to the HATE GROUP DDHG. How would Kerry Gray even know that an email was all over the web without being in sync with a group that seeks out hatred? Come on people – this is common sense. This site needs to be SHUT DOWN. Read about all the pain and suffering, the money hungry owners and PLEASE write your congressmen to change the laws of the internet to make website owners responsible for what THEY MAKE MONEY ON. Read the blog… It is very apparent that many of the posts are made by staff members of DDHG to hurt someone, in this case someone called Cindy. Is this for gutter publicity? D D H G will use any means to gain publicity, whether it be through linking recent Hollywood abuse stories to their site, posting fake anonymous blogs, or simply hurting individuals by posting potentially false statements on the web while posting personal emails on blogs without factual data. All I can say, is poor Cindy for taking the hit for ME. Yes, nasty and shock-value are the ways of the DDHG money hungry mongers. This has got to stop. Real people gave open responses of their opinions on the blog and WHAM... the "IT’s" of D D H G start to play their well known methodical world of threats, deception, defense, lies and nasty attacks on individuals that don't agree with the site. D D H G is not the place to go if you are a person needing help and Kerry Gray certainly does not have the credentials to be helping people in real need. Sounds like Kerry Gray, the Love Doctor, and the staff at DDHG all need professional counseling. Better yet, the site needs to be shut down. They are all deranged. Tell me, how in the world does this type of hatred benefit society?

Please help to stop the hatred this site invokes. It harms women and men alike. Write your senator or congressman and complain. Hatred and hate groups MUST STOP when they are making money. Remember the KKK? Get rid of them now.

Keesha Kennter

[Lisa M]

I'm a christian and a significant philanthropist. It seems that this site 'claims' through whatever means that they give all of their funds to charity, yet Ms. Cunningham, herself in an interview that is posted on the web says she only gives 'part' of their funds.

That's the first issue I have with this site is that they lie about where the funds go. The second is that they do seem to hurt people more than help them...read the blogs, google, and you will find more than what is anticipated by a site that claims to be helpful to women.

Such a shame during these times that Tasha Cunningham and Kerry Gray use them to the detriment of those that are truly in need of comfort and assistance.

A parishioner came to me asking for guidance. I simply said, The Lord will guide those that hurt others into a safer place.... be still...you are a child of God.

Please write your senators to shut this website down:

www.senate.gov

www.usa.gov/Contact/Elected.shtml

PEACE AND LOVE,
NO MORE HATE IS NEEDED IN THIS WORLD.

Pastors wife,
Lisa M

[Lisa M is a Fraud]

So wait a minute Lisa. You've come to a blog where the last post was made over a year ago to trash DDHG and the site's owner, who you do not know personally and have no knowledge about?

Grow up Lisa, take responsibility for your actions. Tasha didn't do anything to you or anyone else on the site. You are certainly not a Christian and I doubt you're a preacher's wife. If you were, you wouldn't resort to attacking DDHG and the site's owner all over the Internet. May God be with you, because you're going to need it!

Tasha, if you do ever read these things, keep doing what you're doing. You have helped many women, more than you will ever know. Thank you for donating whatever amount you donate to women's charities. In this economy, a website that donates is refreshing and much appreciated. Thank you!

-- http://www.redorbit.com/news/technology/1202236/video_dontdatehimgirlcom_launches_new_charitable_fund_to_empower_women_in/index.html

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http://www.cheatingways.com/world-affairs/kudos-to-dont-date-him-girl?jal_no_js=true&poll_id=3

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http://dontdatehimgirl.com/news_view/ddhg-integrates-predatorbarriercom-free-sex-offender-search-api-394.html

--

http://DDHGEmpowers.org

What have you done for the world lately Lisa? Women like you are a disgrace. You get all of your friends to post on year old or two year old blogs about DDHG. You're pathetic and certainly not a Christian. When people like your husband take responsibility for their actions when they date women, the world will be a better place. We're going to circulate a petition to close your church down!

And please go ahead and write your senators about DDHG. Since DDHG is oh sooooo bad, maybe they'll take down DDHG before they take down all the Klan sites and pedophile sites, right? Wrong! How about the right to free speech and taking responsibility for your actions?

[Keesha Kennter is a Fraud]

When you google Keesha Kennter's name, the only thing that pops up is 37 posts on Online Personals Watch about DDHG. Is that obsession or is she just deranged?

[Kerry Gray]

My, My. We appreciate all the publicity and press. My mother was a newspaper woman for many years, and she used to say if we had them talking, we were doing our job. I guess Don't Date Him Girl is doing it's job!
Keep posting, we look forward to it. Mark, thanks for giving us a format.

For the record, I am Kerry Gray and I am a real person, not Tasha, not staff, not a person with a hidden agenda. Mark Brooks can actually testify to the fact that I am a real person in Austin, Texas. Women write me from all over the world and tell me how much I have helped them. Their stories are collected in a soon to be published book, which I hope you will read. You can visit me in Austin, Texas, where I teach very popular teen dating classes, write on the internet, and work in a hospital. Yes, I am qualified to give love advice to hurting women, which I have done with much success for quite some time now.
I sense a very personal agenda from these women who post criticizing our site, and I defend their right to disagree with our site. Let me add that no one makes them log in and read it, they choose to. I wish I knew their personal stories and why they are hurting so badly; I do not. My best guess is that their husbands or boyfriends cheated on them and were posted by them or others on Don't Date Him Girl. It is hard to move on after heartbreak, and these posters are great examples of that. We have a very positive website, with lots of great articles and tips on improving relationships, finances, and health and well-being. I guess there will always be some haters in the world, and they prove themselves as such by actually posting under a name with Hate in their address and title. I am curous what a pastor's wife is doing in the middle of what is obviously a painful and personal attack by others on the site. My guess, too, is that her husband has cheated and been posted and perhaps outed on the site. I do not deny that is painful, but I will always defend a posters right to share with the world their experiences of being wronged by the hands of another. Again, keep posting to us, my friends. We appreciate the publicity. My invitation stands, as always, to those who are hurting so much they resort to these postings instead of getting help to move on with the heartbreak in their lives. You may always write me for a personal response, and you can come see me in Austin if you wonder whether or not I am a real person. I am. Thanks so much for the dialogue.

Ms. Gray, why are you so happy about getting publicity from women that are hurting? My team have been following the blogs and documenting the hidden html's and Tasha's threats. We have substantial evidence and in the last week, the site master on DDHG made some changes on the hidden HTML's which we believe are concurrent with the true statements made about how the site operates.

If you feel that this type of 'publicity' is a positive motivation, my team would ask that you comment on the changes that took place this past week, since there could possibly be a class action lawsuit.

Looking forward to your response, since you are a 'real' person.

Lawyer for the people.

[Kerry Gray]

Dear Lawyer for the People,

Please write me at my personal email, listed all over Don't Date Him Girl.com, and let me know who you really are and what your complaints are about the site. Many, many women have written me, from all over the world, for advice for their problems. They ALL, unanimously, thank me for helping them and tell me how much the site has helped them by giving them a link to other women with some of the same problems. I have never had one single woman write me to tell me that the site has hurt them in any way. Please have your team figure out a response to that. I have posted many times that I have had nothing but helpful positive feedback from many, many readers, but your team does not respond to that truth. Until then, and until you write me yourself at my personal email at [email protected], I have no further response to this campaign that slanders a legitimate site that many women, and men, use. I'm sorry, but that is the truth. I am a real person, and real women write me all the time and tell me how much my advice has helped them and how much they love Don't Date Him Girl. End of story.

[Anonymous]

Funny, if you're REALLY a lawyer, wouldn't you want to post your information for others to contact you. Falsely stating that you are a lawyer when you are NOT is a crime. Your IP you used to make these postings can be tracked and traced. You can also be reported to your local authorities based on your IP for further investigation. If you are a lawyer and posting on this blog, your state Bar association can also be contacted.

It's obvious that your goal is to make others think you're a lawyer, when indeed you are not. You sound like Keesha Kanter, a FAKE person who needs to get a life and stop harassing DDHG and it's owner just because you were posted on the site. Neither DDHG or the site's owner made you post on that site.

[Anonymous laughing at Anonymous]

Isn't it interesting that 'anonymous' and 'Kerry Gray' and 'From Kerry' all post after one another???

Anonymous - GET A GRIP...this is a BLOG. Every post you make threatens about "YOUR IP WILL BE BLAH BLAH BLAH".

Tasha, if you had the balls to run your site responsibly, you wouldn't be trashed all over the internet.

And Ms Gray,
Great if you're helping people who reach out to you....unfortunately you are missing the point with those that won't because of the threats and hatred shared about the site. Where is your compassion about that?

And to Lawyer for the People:
Please post your information or a way to contact you - it would be nice for those that want to join the class action lawsuit to support you and your team; to change the laws, to help stop the pain and danger.

[Lisa M]

I am a devoted Christian that has 2 charities for children and women in need. Yes, a parishioner came to me and in confidence shared that she has been threatened and harassed and that she is suicidal because of what the site has done to her.

After reading many of the comments about this site, it's clear that she has been trapped into a situation that is dangerous to her life. She has had to leave her job and move and is homeless with 3 children because of endless threats.

I'm truly sorry that a poster thinks I'm a disgrace. I'm only one of many in the church assisting to support her and the children.

Ms. Gray,
Even the tone of your posts would scare someone away from help. "End of Story?" How could someone devoted to helping be so threatening?

Yes, this is the internet. And unfortunately, DDHG has shown no mercy in helping those that have asked.

Our Father, Who art in heaven
Hallowed be Thy Name;
Thy kingdom come,
Thy will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread,
and forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass against us;
and lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil. Amen.

[Take Responsibility For Your Actions Lisa M.]

That's funny - "what the site did to her". The site didn't do anything to her. She came to the site, she used it and found her man cheating on the site. Then she wants to blame the site for it?

Really, Lisa M., you should not be posting prayers on this site. You are NOT a Christian. You're a disgraceful hater. You appear to be nuts and anyone who reads this blog can tell that.

What charities are you a part of? Why don't you name them? And why doesn't "Lawyer for the People" state his name. You're a huge, disgraceful fraud!

End of story.

[Grace Pollack]

How do I get on the site? Is it shut down? A man I am dating is listed as being there on google but I can't get to the posting?

[From Kerry]

Hi Grace,
No it's not shut down, it just operates in a scrupulous manner. You can find the postings, but not on the actual site once the webmasters deletes information and changes how the website pages are linked in the servers.

The way it works is that if a posting is deleted by DDHG behind the scenes, they will create a separate link that is not on the main forum page of the original posting. So if you are looking through the forums and what is actually on the site AS OF TODAY, you will not find it - and Google's automatic crawl will not delete or keep the website true to what the up to date content of the site reflects in real time when information is deleted from the forums.

For example: http://dontdatehimgirl.com/forum/name-of-guy-with-title-of-posting-tm53516.html.
This is a hidden link (notice that not even a forum name is listed in the URL).

Sometimes the link will have the name in it and sometimes it won't.

The other way the site operates to not reflect current content is to link pages with forum numbers that archive forum data that may have deleted information.

For example:
http://dontdatehimgirl.com/forum/cheating f101.html is the forum link for real life data....

However - when they want to take snapshots of pages that have deleted information where Google cannot update the current info, they will create a link that will show up in Google but you can't find it on the website:

Example:

dontdatehimgirl.com/forum/cheating-f101,start,100.html and they continue with the ,200,300,400 etc.

Keep looking - they cache the pages and make sure that they aren't deleted from searches even though they made the decision to delete the user or the posts. Note: Honest webmasters mostly do NOT agree with this approach.

If information is deleted by the site, it should be deleted completely.

Hope this helps you and please feel free to write again if you have any additional questions.

[Tasha]

Ms Gray,
No need to write you at your email...many people realize at this point that there is NO SUPPORT for any contact at DDHG unless they GIVE UP anonymity. Uh HUM... Isn't that what the SITE BOASTS about????.....

The best place to contact would be:

www.ic3.gov/complaint

Look DDHG up; everywhere, and knock them to there knees.

You know whats funny....they brag about 90 percent of the time they help people, but the website is destroying peoples lives and safety...

With President Obama in office - don't ya think a BLACK CHICK would stop this crap and get on board with helping women that are FUCKING FREAKING out from being beat up from her site????????????????

Piss on you all...this site only makes hate and troubles worse not better..

[Jermaine]

I recently found a post against me on this website...DDDG...I am appauled that there are websites like this whose sole purpose is cater to pissed -off,mentally deranged,psycho, SUPER EMOTIONAL,obsessed women...."Come on"..what part of the game is that..."

"This is absolutely ridiculous to the 10th degree"......And what is so sad about it...You allow other silly woman with some of the characteristics I mentioned above.... to establish an alliance with the individual who posted these lies against me without even knowing anything about me......:::::Come On::::......"There are two sides to every story"!!!!!..Truth be told...I found some deeply, disturbing info about the "postee"...and was told lie, UPON LIE, UPON LIE... ...Nevertheless, you don't see me putting her "On Blast" in front of anyone........I am waaaaaaaayyyy better than that.....plus, that type of negativity is not what I'm about or even stand for....

I am a grown man, and I don't have anything to prove to anybody...or explain myself to anybody regarding an aqaintanceship that went "Sour"...:::Point blank:::

It is a very dangerous thing to attempt to ruin someone's reputation based upon false info and lies..."In my last e-mail to "Her",..I told her... in your attempt to dig a hole for me..."Make sure you dig a deeper one for yourself"....Because you are "For Sure"..going to fall in it......Obviously Ms poeticchristianchick does not/did not want to listen...

So, I'm going to make this perfectly clear....TO WHOMEVER IT MAY CONCERN:....I would appreciate it very much if this post be taken down immediately..and the account of the poster...be deleted.......

[Cathy]

I am a single woman and I have to say DDHG does not help me date more responsibly like it claims. It is despicable that Tasha Cunningham poses as savior for dating women. I have browsed the site and I have seen NO TASTEFUL POST on there. Tasha Cunningham enables women to display names, pictures, and very personal information on men, all that anonymously. That is not a fair game! Hiding behind a website to publicly offend and harm men is cheap. But Tasha, it is truly disgraceful to be the enabler of such a malicious deception. And make tons of $$$$ in the process. DDHG and Tasha Cunningham are allowing women to be as low as they could be. That concerns me …

[Susan]

Well, it looks like its only a matter of time before what comes around goes around to Tasha Cunningham. It is so incredible that she has gotten away with such a trashy site for so long. Finally, movement is going forward to end this type of garbage on the net. Seems like Google was forced to give up anonymous users based on the following:

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=8359356

Whoo hoo - revenge is sweet when you let time take its time. What comes around goes around and Tasha and her team are on the edge of the unstoppable mudslide.