NEW YORK TIMES - A slew of matchmaking companies and articles declare matchmaking is hot again. Netflix shows: "Indian Matchmaking," "Married at First Sight," "Bridgerton." In today's online world, burnout, opacity and callousness define dating. Options, filters and low barriers to engagement often don't translate to high-quality interactions.
[with matchmaking] a mediated match connects people who are looking for the same kind of relationship education, religion, values and may ease the difficulties of approach. Matchmakers add accountability.
Intermediation is best combined with another hallmark of traditional courtship: early, transparent communication about values and long-term goals. In practice [online dating filters] aren't used well. It's not uncommon to date for years without broaching the big questions about marriage and children. Sex tends to be embraced more quickly. A 2010 study (APA Journal of Family Psych) found that couples who waited until marriage to have sex reported less consideration of divorce and higher relationship satisfaction
Meeting someone through a 3rd party like a friend, parent or matchmaker, creates accountability that discourages bad behavior. They are mentors who can look at the matchmaking process "from an objective place". Many of us go on dates seeking the spark of chemistry and tumble into bed, or relationships, often without ever determining whether our prospective partners pass the most basic of compatibility tests.
Mark Brooks: The online personals industry needs to be more personal. Computers aren't quite enough for many people, who will pay for human guidance and encouragement. The critical services are pre and post-date feedback and careful, customized guidance and encouragement. I am backing matchmaker.com (in development) to help the dating industry connect with the matchmaking industry en masse.